ok... when we last left of... the protagonist of our story... a.k.a. "ME!" xD just suffered a big change... and at first evrything was going well...
last days of november: the DotA tournament was coming so fast that my team had no time to practice the combos... (personal note: i did do the combos... but for all pick... not for normal pick... T.T) plus.. to add that.. my mind was one other place.. i was thinking.. time and time again... bout... her.. bout how i'd give it all up 4 her... and i was happy.. happy just 2 be by her side.. she was my ana pascal and i was her mr. crick... i had to balance my days in... exercise... (personal note: i HATE running... but i do it evryday... and no more weight lifting 4 me T.T) training DotA with the team and doing sumthing with her... or at least talking 2 her... it was a busy couple of weeks xD.... then the dota tournament came.. and half of my team didn't showed up... i was so angered!
1st of dicember: has it ever happen 2 u... that evrything is going 2 damn right... and sumthing just oughta go wrong... well... this day... this is a fucked up day!... it started just as any other in that week... i stayed at home that day to help my mom in evrything... she wanted to make a video 4 her work... she is the owner of cominco... she works so hard! i admire her... sumday... i'll be able to pay her back 4 all she does 4 me and my lil sis... then it was time to go out n party... sumthing told me that this day wasn't a good day 2 go out... but still... i didn't listen...
it was bruna's bday party... wich i do not understand why she celebrated 2 WEEKS BEFORE! xD.. go figure ^^.. anywho... (personal note: i stole that frase from my wife n kids xD... the only reason i turn on the tv ^^ "anywho...") it was rly fun... at the beginning tons of ol' geezers were havin a blast dancin n i was so @.@ xD... brazillians rly r diferents xD... paraguayans would not likely do that xD...
then sum classmates push me 2 the dancefloor... (personal note: is not that i don't like dancing... i just don't like sum of the music they had on..) and i had to dance -.- xD... so the party when on and on till 5 am... n then... sumthing happened... after that i just... lost all joy at once.. it was as i had fallen from the mountain wich i was just begining to climb... anyways... since that i'm vry different.. i know u understand.. cuz u were the only one that did... i won't say i'm sry.. cuz u know.... but... what i said... i still do feel that way... and i just need time.. time to calm... i'm not asking for u to forgive me 4 the stuff i said... i just want u to understand.. my decisions... it's not a goodbye... is a "i'll see u later alligator ;)"...
the first days of december: well... since dicember 1st not so much had happened... the days kinda come n go as they please... i made the vid 4 my mom n evryone at her work was so proud of me... kinda made me feel that i'm not a total waste 4 her ^^... i just live 4 her these days... driving her arround... helping her out... trying to atone 4 18 years of revelry ^^...
today: today is a weird day... i shoould be more exited... is my graduation... n i'm just so neutral... i just try to smile... but have no reason... but no reason not to either... i have evrything prepared 4 tonight... just... wish me good luck evry1... i'll need it...
thx 4 reading this... and as i promised... here goes 2 poem i wrote a long time ago... the first one is for my fallen hamalach.. the one that made me strong 4 so long... and the other one... is for my grandpa.. he was the person i respected, admired, cherished and adore... when he died... raziel was born... so here they go...
ode to the HaMalach
i'll flourish u in darkness
be ur dark temptress
the desire u can't handle
inside ur skin i'll crawl
i'll fill ya with lies
yet.. awnser all ur cries
fear u wanna have
pleasure u can't stop
i'll eat ur soul
and fill u with mine
touch ur heart
only to crush it
i'll show u inside
but be warned
not to come in
or u may never leave
i'll sing u my lullaby
of death or rejoice
kiss u good night
and plz do sleep tight
cus the angel of black wings
is hunting again...
is hard to say goodbye
our time have come
and we shall be one no more
when i felt i had no partner
you were there for me
in times of happyness
and in my darkest hour
u were holding my hands
wiping my tears
when i thought i was left alone
u stood by me, telling me
u'll allways be by my side
that if i'd want
u'll spread u'r wings
and we'll fly away
is so hard
to accept ure gone
that is time to walk alone
is so hard to say goodbye
si quieren dejar un comentario.. ahi ta el shoutbox... o directamente dejas un comentario ahi donde dice "comentarios" xD... pero ese tarda mas ^^
ok... with nuthing more 2 say
see ya space cowboys
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21 comentarios:
=o. estoy un poco perdida. quien es raziel? suerte en tu prom!!!! ;D
parece que te gusta escribir... podes leer mi blog si queres... es parecido al tuyo.. pero nada mas que desde mi perspectiva de las cosas... jejeje... saludos
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